Red Light Special
by Brits23
Summary: Stemmed from a pic-prompt that my twin and I challenged ourselves to. See the pic here: Previously posted on MasterPerv Theatre RIP . CxB AU... Doctor Cullen is rated VERY M...
1. Chapter 1

**Stephenie Meyer owns any Twilight characters and Twilight plot lines that may appear in this story. The remainder is the original work of Brits23. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without my express written authorization. Don't steal, it isn't polite.**

**-x-x-x-x-x-**

**~xxx~**

**BPOV**

"Come on, put it down," I chuckled shyly, walking backwards as the gorgeous man in the white coat pursued me.

He smiled briefly, his mouth turning into a wry "V" before his expression became serious once more. "I just want to take a picture of you, lover."

I looked behind him, ensuring that no one had followed us into the empty on-call room. It didn't matter, really. When Carlisle Cullen pushed me into an empty corridor, nothing had the power to stop me. Nothing ever would. Not the man I had waiting for me at home. Not the gold band he tucked into his pocket before he let his fingers drift along my skin. The only thing that existed was the fire in his eyes as he pushed me backwards with nothing but the force of his body.

He was the golden boy of the hospital, but when he was mine…he was dirty. Rough, passionate and the opposite of what anyone knew him to be. Even when the blonde woman who had endured too much plastic surgery came in to give him lunch and a kiss, he pretended for her. I wasn't claiming to be the only one who knew this man as the deviant sex-god that he was, but I knew that I was incredibly lucky. Carlisle Cullen oozed sex, made me cum with the tip of his finger and sent me right into another climax with the smooth timbre of his voice.

"Just a picture," he murmured, voice deep, eyes intent and hungry as he gazed at me through the screen of his iPhone.

I continued walking backwards as he stalked me, until my back was flat against the wall. Warning bells kept going off in my mind. The ER was so busy tonight, voices were filtering in, so close and yet here he was, gazing at me hungrily through a screen and all I wanted was to be the leading lady in his film.

"There, don't move," he whispered, licking his plump bottom lip as he discarded his white coat and loosened his tie. "One by one, lover, undo them."

My fingers were shaking as I nervously took off my own coat and began to unbutton my shirt, forcing myself to focus on the arousal he set loose inside me rather than the potential of getting caught, but then again…maybe I _wanted_ to get caught.

Goosebumps spread along my skin as my fingers drifted along it with each button undone. I wanted to be sexy for him, I wanted to see his hazel-grey eyes glaze over in pleasure as they raked along my body. "Like this?" I asked him softly.

His tongue stroked his bottom lip as he nodded minutely, removing his tie before pressing his palm flat against the sizeable bulge in his pants. "Mmm…like that. Slide it off your shoulders when you're through."

I stared at him from beneath my lashes as I reached the last button, my fingertips ghosting up and down the vertical trail of skin that was now exposed to him. I smirked, resting them against the center of my bra. "Just a picture, hmm? What's that red light for then?"

His lips twisted into a grin before he fell serious once more, grabbing the phone with two hands as he took a few steps closer. "Don't ask questions…just do what I say, be a good girl and I'll make sure you get a nice treat when we're through. Alright, lover?"

He started calling me that endearment after the second time we were together. He bent me over an exam table in an empty room, hand clamped over my mouth as I screamed and screamed and screamed. He had that effect on me. No sooner had I finished riding the waves of ecstasy did he pull away, kissing my temple and whispering a simple phrase that had me aching for more. "Until next time, lover."

It still had the power to destroy me.

"Bella," he whispered in slight admonishment, my eyes jerking back to his as he stared at me sternly. "Take it off, don't make me ask again."

I swallowed thickly and relished in the trembling of my body as the soft fabric slid off my bare shoulders and fell to the floor. I crossed my arms over my abdomen, waiting for further instruction as I let my eyes wander up and down his lean, muscular body. He was a masterpiece, under appreciated really, and I had done my best in the past several months to show him just how valuable he was.

"Move your hands," he murmured through parted lips, moving the phone back and forth to capture each part of me. "Don't hide from me, you are astounding."

I pressed my palms flat against the wall and watched him watch me, my chest heaving as he penetrated me with his ravenous stare. "Can…can you come closer?" I mumbled, watching the way his fingers twitched as his side. I could almost feel them sliding down my stomach before releasing the button of my pants. I had a feeling I'd be doing all the work this time, however, and I had no qualms about that whatsoever.

He shook his head once, rocking from foot to foot slowly as he filmed me. "Not yet…give me a little more."

I nodded, sliding my hand up my side until I was cupping my breast through the lacy fabric of my black bra. I could feel my hard nipple pushing through the barrier and into my palm, begging for friction. He spurred me on with a quiet "yes" until I was pulling and twisting it along with the rough fabric, my eyes falling closed as the pleasure spread throughout my body.

I heard him move closer, my eyes clenching tight at the prospect of his skin on mine. I opened my eyes to see his grey shirt un-tucked from his black pants, his fingers working deftly on the buttons of his shirt with one hand. The other held steadily as he filmed me, watched me, worshipped me on the tiny screen. "Reach behind you with one hand and release the clasp of your bra, Bella. _Now_, before I come over there and rip it off of you."

I briefly thought of defying him so he could do exactly that, but no matter how tempting it was to flare his anger, it felt so satisfying to follow his commands, to be good for him so he would be good for me. I kept on caressing my nipple as my other hand lifted to release the clasp of my bra until only my hand on my breast was keeping it from falling. I looked up at him and his nostrils were flared, breathing heavily as he took another step closer, but still out of reach. "Let it fall, lover. Don't keep me waiting."

I let the garment fall from my grasp, joining my shirt on the floor beneath me. He looked so pleased with me as his eyes moved along my skin, studying me with apt attention as he shifted his dress shirt off his shoulders. I drew lazy lines between my breasts as my mouth fell open, taking in his toned chest, the sprinkling of chest hair covering it, and the contours of his abdomen. I followed the dark line of hair beneath his belly button until it disappeared beneath his belt buckle, affixing my eyes on his cock that was straining obtrusively against the expensive fabric of his dress pants. I wanted to feel him hot in my mouth, but I knew this experience wasn't about that just yet. It was a lesson in control. Every time he'd taken me, it had been fast and hard and frantic. Now, he wanted build up. Now he wanted me pleading, and there was no doubt that I would be. I was already so close to the edge.

"Tell me what you're looking at," he muttered beneath his breath, letting his thumb slide up the thick shaft that was hidden behind dark fabric.

"Your…your body," I stuttered, pulling my lip between my teeth, and letting my thumb stroke heavily over my other nipple.

"Where?"

"Your cock…"

"Why, Bella?"

"Because I want it."

"Where do you want it?"

I closed my eyes briefly and splayed my hand across my abdomen, sliding it lower until I was rubbing myself forcefully over my pants. "Right here, I want it right here."

"Not yet."

I suppressed a frustrated groan, continuing to rub myself as he gazed at me. "Move your hand back up," he commanded, my eyes jerking lower as he released his belt from the loop. The minute he noticed where my attention had gone, he made no further movement to relieve himself of it.

I put a hand over each breast, massaging the soft skin until I heard a muted moan coming from his lips. "Push them together, just like that."

I pressed the back of my head against the wall, complying as I pushed my breasts tight together.

He hummed in appreciation, stroking himself fully through his pants. "That's where you're going to get it one day soon, lover. Right between those gorgeous tits."

I moaned, squeezing them tighter in my grasp as my legs pushed forcefully together.

"_Fuck_. Pants, Bella. Don't go slow. Tear them off of you and do it now. Everything, your panties, your shoes, your socks…I want nothing on your body, I want you completely bare and forever at my mercy. Do it _now_."

I scrambled to remove the remainder of my clothing, yanking at the button of my pants until it rang out against the floor. It was no matter, nothing mattered but baring myself for him. When I was finally naked, I focused on my labored breathing. Every inch of my skin was sensitive, and I just couldn't remember if he had turned the lock. People were rushing past the door that hid us and it only turned me on further to know how close we were to potentially being exposed.

The clanking of metal pulled me out of my thoughts, and I watched as he released his belt completely and let it hang off of his body. That only made me think of the time when he sprawled me across his lap and let it land with a sharp slap against my backside weeks ago. That very belt. He accused me of flaunting my little ass in front of him just for pure torment. He was right, and I came with his fingers inside me and his belt leaving pink marks across my pale skin.

"I know what you're thinking about, Bella," he spoke darkly, pulling the zipper of his pants down one tooth at a time. So slowly, so carefully, and yet his eyes were crazed and sinister. "Be good for me and the only thing slapping against your skin will be this."

His hand slid inside his pants and wrapped around his cock, stroking himself and denying me the perfect sight of his large hand fisted around his swollen shaft.

"Just because I don't have a camera doesn't mean I can't enjoy the view, you know." I was being feisty and he liked it, but right now he was in control, and right now he needed me to behave. My time would come. Quite literally.

He smirked at me sinfully, shaking his head. "Doesn't matter, lover. You are my entertainment. Everything you do in this room is for me. The throb of my cock and my racing heart, you exist for that alone and nothing else. Now close your mouth and slide that sweet ass down the wall. Knees apart, feet on the floor. Spread wide for me, right now."

See, that was the thing about Carlisle Cullen. His words were sex. His words were flesh sliding against flesh, pleasure and pain and pure, unadulterated eroticism. Wifey got two pumps and a pat on the head. I got spanked and fucked until I couldn't remember my name. She could have his dirty laundry and his days away from the hospital. I had the part of him that was secret, filthy, and _mine._

I put my hands on my knees and slid languidly down the wall, stopping when I could go down no further. I spread my legs and exposed the pink, wet skin of my pussy that belonged only to him. So wet, aching to be spread across his flesh in any approximation.

He hummed low in his throat, praising, satisfied with what he saw before him. "This is why I can't control my need for you, lover. Every single day I see you and I know you're soaking wet for me. It doesn't matter if we simply pass each other in the hallway or my hand slides along your back. You're dripping for me, every second. How can I not take what belongs to me?"

I whimpered, pressing my head forcefully against the wall as he took one step closer. If I really tried, he may have been close enough for me to touch with the tips of my fingers. He was so intent on keeping his distance, driving me crazy, making me ache.

"Your middle finger…one swipe, right through that wet slit. Let me see you glisten."

My whole body was trembling violently as I reached between my legs, pushing my middle finger against my clit and crying out at the subtle contact. I slid it down until it was nearly inside me before going back up once more and circling my clit again. I was close to cumming, a swipe of my finger and his dirty words…it was literally all it took. He knew it too.

"You cum now and it's the only one you get, keep that in mind." He looked at me darkly and ran his tongue along his top lip. "Well, let me see."

I lifted my hand up and gave him _the _middle finger, smirking at him before turning it and showing him the wetness I had collected.

"Bad, Bella…"

He had no idea how bad I could be.

"Is this what you want?" I asked him.

"In your mouth." His voice was hoarse as he swallowed thickly, finally removing his cock from his pants and stroking it tightly just for me. "Suck that finger like you'd suck this cock."

Not hesitating for a second, I pushed my wet finger between my closed lips, not stopping until I had the entire length of it in my mouth. I slid my mouth up and down it, tasting my flavor and showing him exactly what I'd do to that thick fucking cock of his.

"Get every drop," he breathed roughly, staring at me through his screen and squeezing his cock tightly in his fist.

I licked my finger thoroughly, swirling my tongue around it like it was my favorite flavor of ice cream…or his engorged cock pushing it's way into my mouth. When I was through I placed my hands on my knees once more, spreading my legs impossibly wider. He released his cock instantly, erect and waiting for me, pink and hard and twitching for _me._

"Are you comfortable?" Always the gentlemen, even while he's doing evil, sordid things to my body.

In truth, my legs were a bit sore from holding the position he demanded of me, but it was nothing I couldn't handle. And judging by where I was crouched and where he was standing, I could only hope he wanted me down here for a reason. "I'm fine, thank you."

He winked, grabbing the phone with two hands once more as he walked forward, his throbbing dick calling out to me like a siren. He stopped about a foot in front of me, his cock so achingly close to my lips that I could almost taste it.

He moved closer, letting the wet head of his dick press against my closed mouth. It took every ounce of willpower I had not to reach out and engulf him inside me, but I needed to be good for him. I wanted my treat. I had a feeling I was going to get it.

"Good girl," he murmured, like he knew the struggle I was enduring, and praising the resistance I maintained. He pushed against my lips, sliding the swollen head of his cock back and forth. "Don't you dare open that mouth," he hissed, teasing me with his fluid across my lips and the hotness of his skin. I resisted, looking up at the red light of that camera, knowing I was pouting at him through it, knowing how innocent and sexy I looked with his dick sliding along my mouth.

"You're such a pretty little thing," he said softly, letting a hand slide beneath my hair. "Such a good girl, waiting so patiently to be fed…"

I swallowed thickly, my tongue pushing against my lips and begging for just a little taste of his pre-cum. Just a taste. He brought the phone lower, catching the image of his cock drifting along my mouth. "Ready for a taste, Bella?"

I nodded, pleading with my eyes for his cock in my throat.

He smiled slightly, taking my chin between his thumb and forefinger and pulling down until my mouth was open. I knew better than to move just yet. He traced the shape of my jaw, letting the head of his cock hover in front of my open lips before he slid his hand into my hair and gripped it tightly. I moaned as he pulled it sharply, my head jerking back until our eyes met. "Hands on my wrists, lover. Hold on tight."

I wrapped my hand around his wrist, his fingers twisted into my hair tightly as I reached up for the other. He was holding the phone and I held on securely to his other wrist, careful not to jostle him and ruin his view on the small screen. No hands…I smiled triumphantly. He was going to fuck my mouth, and he wasn't going to hold back.

He watched intently as he pushed his way through my parted lips, only stopping when he could go no further. His thumb slid along my neck in encouragement as he murmured my name, telling me to look in his eyes. "You're taking more…you're taking it all."

I moaned around his thick length, my grip tightening around his wrists as he pushed further down my throat, causing me to choke slightly. "It's all right," he soothed, his voice strained as he cursed loudly. "Come on baby, press your nose to my belly. You can take me, press your nose…right there…_fuck_…yeah. So good…"

My moan died around his cock that was taking up every inch of my airway. Carlisle groaned once more and pushed against my throat, his pace increasing as he slid in and out of my mouth rapidly. He was thrusting into me hard, making me feel his cock so deeply and I wanted more. I wanted his cum, hot and salty in my mouth, I wanted him to fuck me until he collapsed, until we both collapsed, until this fucking building collapsed…

Three more pumps and he held me forcefully against him, all the way in, all the way down, and the way he groaned, so desperately, so achingly…it was more than I could take. I began to draw heavy circles around my dripping pussy with my finger, needing release, needing so much fucking more. He pulled out of my mouth swiftly once he realized what I was doing, grabbing my chin and lifting until I was gazing at him. "Don't you dare. That's _mine_…when I finally let you cum, I'm going to be fucking that pretty little pussy with my tongue."

He crouched down in front of me and lowered his phone until it was level with my pussy, staring at the screen hungrily as he held it there. With the other hand he reached for my discarded white jacket, laying it down between us and setting his phone off to the side. "Sorry, lover, I need both hands now. I'll leave it running though. Maybe I'll have your voice begging me to fuck you as my ringtone. Would you like that?"

I bit my lip, whimpering as his hands slid down my calves and clamped around my ankles. "I knew you would. Wouldn't you just love to have everyone know how thoroughly you own this cock?" He grabbed it for emphasis, smirking at me dangerously as he continued. "Maybe one day I'll fuck you right out there. In the hallway, for everyone to see. Every time one of those fuck-wads stare at your ass, make crude comments about how sweet your pussy must be, then they'll know that I _own_ that pussy. That young resident, Isabella Swan, with the pouty lips and doe-eyes and fuck-me stare, they'll know that girl comes on _my_ cock, they'll know that girl begs to be fucked by _me_. I'll make sure they never fucking forget it."

Without warning he pulled on my ankles until I was sitting on my coat, eyes wide as he pulled further until my legs were on either side of him. His fingers kneaded my muscles carefully, working out the kinks from staying in one position for so long. The back of his fingers drifted along my throat as he gazed into my eyes. I was lost for a long moment until his hands were no longer on me, signaling my alarm. I leaned forward hastily to see that he had pushed his pants further down, but didn't take them off.

He chuckled at my hasty actions, hovering over me until his forearms were pressed on either side of my head. "Easy, lover. Do you really think I'd leave you now, like this? Spread, bare, waiting to be pounded? Not a chance…"

I wrapped my arms around him, digging my nails into his shoulder blades and dragging down as I undulated against his body. "Please…I need you to fuck me, Carlisle. Please…"

"God that was it, right there." He leaned down and kissed me slowly, letting his tongue make love to my mouth as he pulled my legs tighter around his waist. "That's the breathless, pleading voice that keeps me up at night. Right there…"

This was the moment that always got me, the moment the head of his cock pressed against my entrance. It didn't matter if I was beneath him, he was behind me, I was on top of him or any other compromising position we found ourselves in. For that split second, the moment before he entered me, there was one ritual he had never broken…

The one act that made this whole thing so fucking confusing between he and I.

"Bella…" Whispers my name like a gentle prayer.

Brushes the hair from my neck and kisses me sweetly there.

"You're beautiful…" Lips pressed against mine, slow, so slow and wet and compassionate.

And then he pushed his way inside me until I was so incredibly full and shaking with need. One last long, meaningful look…

And then it was over.

"God, you're so tight around me. I'm going to make you scream so fucking loud, you have no idea."

I let go of the questions his gentleness brought about and lost myself once more to what we were best at. Pleasure. Sex. Climax. Fucking like animals and growling like beasts. This was what we were, after all.

His teeth dug into my shoulder as I squeezed his ass forcefully, lifting my hips and joining his thrusts until our skin was slapping loudly together. I loved when he filled me like this, the way he grunted above me and the feel of our sweat-laden bodies sliding together. Sometimes I wondered what it would be like to fuck him somewhere other than this hospital, but I quickly dismissed it. This was what we were.

He bit my nipple and I screamed, pushing back against his engorged cock harder as he sucked the sting he produced. My breasts bounced in his face and he lapped at them heavily, his tongue leaving a wet trail across my skin. The cool air hit it and heightened my senses; when his chest began sliding against mine once more everything became overwhelming, and I desperately needed to cum. He held me by the hips, stilling both of our movements as he gazed at me with a burning passion. "No…My tongue gets the first one."

He slid down my body, his teeth dragging across my heated flesh, his eyes never leaving mine. His teeth didn't stop, scraping down my inner thigh and back up again until he was devouring my pussy.

That was the other thing about Carlisle Cullen. When he gave head, he never held back. His tongue was long and perfect as it moved inside me, reaching places it logically couldn't go. He used both hands to spread me wider, his nose managing to do this swirl-push thing against my clit, hard enough to have me whimper-screaming like I meant it. He was magic. Pure fucking magic.

He was sloppy, too. In a good way. He loved feeling me on his face, licking me off of his lips. He wore it proudly, because if he wasn't good at it, it sure as hell wouldn't have been there. But he was well aware of just how good he was.

I was so close to cumming, his tongue pushing and pulling inside of me as his fingers went _everywhere_ else, stroking, swirling, making me ache. He abandoned my pussy without warning and I quite literally cried, reaching for him frantically as he smirked up at me from between my legs. "I'm going to slap that smile right off your face," I panted.

"Ooh…promise?"

He was evil.

He watched me in amusement as he slid one long finger in and out of my body, slowly, way too fucking slowly. "How many can you take?" he whispered, reaching down to barely graze my clit with the tip of his tongue.

I lunged forward, pulling a handful of his hair hard enough to induce a moan from him. "Fuck, keep that up and you'll be pounded straight through that wall, lover."

"Ooh…promise?" I mocked him.

He bit my inner thigh, inserting another finger. "Bad, Bella," he chastised, just the way I liked it.

I began rocking against his fingers, drowning out his attempt to torture me and focusing on him inside my body. "Two more and I'm going to finger-fuck you so hard, lover. And just when you think you're gonna cum, I'm replacing them with my tongue. Did you catch all that?"

"Loud. And. Clear." I couldn't catch my breath as he stroked me, stretching me wider and curling his fingers inside me, narrowly missing that sweet spot…I had no doubt that he was doing it on purpose.

"Ahhh," I cried, trying to adjust as he filled me so fully, fingers moving at a steady pace until I looked down at him and mouthed two words that I knew would make him lose control. "Fuck me."

And that was all it took.

"You don't know what you've done," he growled, pounding his fingers inside of me, curling and stretching until my wetness was sounding out loudly into the room. "Fuck, fuck, fuck!" I was crying as he took me with nothing but his hand, riding him and vibrating from his ministrations as he brought me closer to the edge. I was going to explode, lose my mind and it would be so fucking impossible to focus on work after an orgasm, or five, from this man.

And I knew that from experience.

I was almost there, almost fucking there, pulling my own hair and grabbing my own tits and reaching down to grab any part of him until he demanded that I stop trying. "Don't hold me down, Bella. There are so many things I'm going to do to this sweet little pussy of yours. Don't hold me down."

I wrapped my fingers around the jacket beneath me, pulling until I could hear the fabric stretch beneath my fingers. My scream was balancing on the edge of a sword, seconds away from being released from my throat, mere moments before the stars collided and I lost control of my body and everything went mind numbingly blank.

My breathing hitched.

Everything went black.

I felt empty and then his tongue was wet and hot inside me and…

"Oh fuck! Oh fuck, fuck, fuck, Oh God…please, I need…Oh my Goddddddd!"

I fell limp, spent and close to hysteria before I felt his strong arms beneath my back, lifting me through the air until I was slammed against the wall he threatened to pound me through. He grabbed my chin. "Look at me. Look at me right now, Bella."

I forced my eyes opened, hazily looking at the pure sex of Carlisle Cullen as I whimpered through the aftershocks of the powerful climax he had just given me. "You aren't done, lover. You aren't done being fucked, do you hear me?"

I managed to nod, tightening my hold around him as he pressed me against the wall and dove his cock to the hilt inside me, holding deadly still. "Stay with me, Bella. I can make you feel even better. I can give you more. Stay with me."

I always stayed with him.

Even when I was sure I would pass out from my screams and his cock and his power…I always managed to stay, because I always wanted to be good for him.

He lifted my hair and bit down hard where my shoulder and neck met. I knew I'd have a mark to hide, but I lived for having something that belonged to he and I, to what we became when we inhabited this room together.

He slammed his cock into me mercilessly, so fucking fast that I was convinced it was impossible for a human being to fuck at such a speed. He barely left the warmth of my body, just pounded and pounded until it felt like he never left me at all. "Love your pussy. It's mine to fuck. You are mine to fuck, Bella. Tell me."

It was true. He wasn't the only one giving the old lady two pumps and a head pat.

"Only you fuck me. Only you, it's only ever you," I panted, tightening my hold around his shoulders and reveling in the soreness of my ass as it slammed into the wall over and over again. Later, when the lights were dark and I was all alone, I would trace the bruises he gave me, sip from a glass of wine and reminisce on what it was like to have him inside me.

My words spurred him on, his hands pulling my hair until my neck was his, teeth dragging up and down the column of my throat as he grunted fervently against my skin. He lifted me higher by his hold beneath my thighs, lifting and pounding, lowering me and pounding, our skin slapping, our moans mingling together like a symphony that could never quite be duplicated. We were sex. Everything about us was sex.

"Bella…" He whimpered my name and when Carlisle Cullen whimpered, he was close to cumming like a fucking Mack truck. I loved his vulnerability just as much as I loved his dominance.

But love wasn't a word I was intent on using, especially when I let myself think about his whispered reverence and his gentle touches when he entered me.

"You make me burn, lover. I never stop thinking about fucking you, feeling you cum on this dick, I need you to cum hard on this dick, Bella."

Ah, there he was. God bless him.

I wanted it too.

I shifted positions, allowing him to go deeper and therefore bring me that much closer to my release. "Almost," I whispered heavily into his ear, sucking it and biting it as I rode him furiously.

"Again…"

No longer was he demanding, he was begging.

And something clenched deep in my chest every time he asked me to whisper in his ear. I couldn't explain why, either.

"Carlisle," I whispered, barely resisting to kiss his earlobe as he moved my body against him rampantly. "You're going to make me cum so hard, and I dream, _dream_ about feeling you swell inside me and give me your cum. Please let me have it, I'm your good girl, let me have it."

He groaned and kissed my shoulder, holding my ass in both hands and pumping into me unevenly, but hard, hard, hard, and…

"Oh God," I whimpered, my entire body clenching down on him, leaving bruises of my own as another climax overtook me. I wasn't expecting it but it was so fucking welcomed and the selfish side of me just wanted to steal all his orgasms until they were mine. All of them. Every single one.

Pump. Pump. Pat.

Whatever.

He groaned so deeply against my neck, stilling and then spilling deep inside me, trying to go even further when he knew that was as far as I went. He still searched, he still yearned for more from my body and I would forever let him try to find it. "Fuuuuuuuck," he hissed, jerking against me, fingers digging into flesh as he called my name once, twice, three times.

"Holy shit, Bella, every time. Every single time. There's nothing better than this. Nothing."

I loved that too, his little murmurings after he'd just cum. I held on like a vice grip until he was prying me off of his body, kissing my lips, my forehead, biting my neck and slapping my ass and then putting on his clothes.

I looked down and noticed the iPhone sitting on its side on the floor, red light still blinking away. I reached down and picked it up, fixing that red light on him as he continued getting dressed. "What are you doing?" he smirked.

"What, you don't like being the subject of this film, Dr. Cullen?"

He smiled, walking toward me and taking it out of my hand. "You're the star, lover."

He kissed my temple and looked down at the clothes that were still discarded around me. "You better get dressed," he murmured, running one finger along my hip bone and striding confidently to the door. As if there were any other way he would stride.

Just as he was about to exit the room, I called his name, causing him to turn around and gaze at me with a hunger that never entirely went away.

"Send me a copy of that video…inquiring minds want to know."

He winked at me, eyes lingering a little longer with something more hidden inside them. "Your wish is my command."

And then he disappeared from my sight.

**-x-x-x-**

**Reviews are love! And also inspiration. Maybe if you let me know how you liked this, I'll find my muse and be able to finish a chapter or two for my other stories! Oy...real life...I tell ya.  
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**Stay tuned for the next installment, and let me know what you think!  
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	2. Chapter 2

**Stephenie Meyer owns any Twilight characters and Twilight plot lines that may appear in this story. The remainder is the original work of Brits23. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without my express written authorization. Don't steal, it isn't polite.**

**-x-x-x-x-x-**

**BPOV**

Another sleepless night.

Even though my eyes burned and my body ached with fatigue, I was still grateful of the fact that Jacob had stayed at his own place tonight. I needed the silence. I needed to be bare and wrapped in silk sheets as I watched the evidence of just exactly what Carlisle Cullen had done to me earlier that week.

"_Come on, put it down," I chuckled shyly, walking backwards as the gorgeous man in the white coat pursued me._

"_Just a picture," he murmured, voice deep, eyes intent and hungry as he gazed at me through the screen of his iPhone. _

_I continued walking backwards as he stalked me, until my back was flat against the wall. Warning bells kept going off in my mind. The ER was so busy tonight, voices were filtering in, so close and yet here he was, gazing at me hungrily through a screen and all I wanted was to be was the leading lady in his film._

"_There, don't move," he whispered, licking his plump bottom lip as he discarded his white coat and loosened his tie. "One by one, lover, undo them."_

His voice had this magical way of charming me into submission. Or maybe it was the intensity of eyes that made me irrevocably his. Whatever it was, it was over-powering, and sexy, and _raw_. We were pure sex together whenever we could steal a moment away in the corner of the hospital or abandoned on-call room. What we had together was fire, electricity…something that neither one of us were able to find with the ones we had waiting at home.

But that was something we never chose to talk about.

Instead we focused on the way our bodies fit together, and all the different sounds of pleasure we made as we touched, kissed and sucked.

I had my iPod playing softly in the background, the playlist that oozed unadulterated sex. I ached so viciously between my legs as I held my phone in the palm of my hand and rewatched the video that had brought me the utmost pleasure and pain since it arrived in my inbox.

The video was mostly me doing what he asked me do as I was spread bare against the wall for him. Once he couldn't stay away from me anymore, he recorded my mouth bobbing up and down on his massive cock, taking him all, my nose against his belly as he encouraged me softly. When he fucked me, the phone was all but forgotten, tossed to the side but still playing, still capturing our primitive cries and our slapping skin and my wet pussy gripping tightly around his swollen cock.

I'd fucked him so many different times before this video was made, but somehow it brought me to this boiling point, this maddening need for Carlisle to claim my body, to mark it, to fuck it until there was never any doubt who I belonged to. I was constantly on edge while at work, always fingering my phone inside my pocket because I knew what it held. I was obsessed with his sounds, the urgency in his voice as he told me how he wanted me, our frantic need and the twinge of indecency that surrounded everything we were.

My God, I needed another taste.

I found a bit of solace in the fact that Carlisle looked just as pained as I did any time I'd encountered him in the three days since he'd been buried inside me. He was usually wearing a sinful smirk, eager to find a way to drive me crazy with a subtle touch of my arm or a graze across my body in the hall. But now he was veiled with desperation. His eyes would meet mine and he'd have to look away, nostrils flaring, fists clenched as he staggered in his confident step.

Today, at the end of my shift, he tried to take me. He broke, he was nearly deranged as his fingers wrapped around my arm and dragged me into a darkened hall, not quite abandoned but he just couldn't fucking wait anymore. He slammed my back into the wall, hips pressing tightly into my own as we breathed the same air. "I need to fuck you now, lover. Tell me I can fuck you now." I had never heard his voice plead like that before. Everything had seemed like such a game to him up until now, but it was as if his life depended on being inside of me right then and there.

I slid my hand between us and didn't stop until he was burning and rigid against my palm, my forehead falling against his shoulder as I whimpered. "Hard…take me hard." I was nearly crying in need as I looked up into his fiery eyes, an explosion brewing between the two of us as his trembling body pressed against me, chest to chest, legs to legs, arms to arms, mouth to mouth. His tongue slid fervently with my own, his unbearably hard cock pushing against me in just the right way. He fumbled for the door knob behind us, a closet, an exam room, I had no clue where we even were.

And then his beeper sounded.

And I would have fucking collapsed to the ground if he wouldn't have caught me.

We were falling apart…all because we both had visible proof of our passion on our fallible, plastic devices.

That was the reason, wasn't it?

Why I couldn't breathe, why he had gone from playfully cocky to desperately needing to stake his claim?

He caught his breath and pushed his forehead against the wall beside me, his hot breath making my pussy pulse in the anticipation of what it was almost about to get. With one hand he pushed two fingers between my legs over my clothes, massaging me in slow, solid strokes as he checked his beeper with the other. I gripped his wrist and pushed his fingers farther into my center, seconds away from cumming because of the need that had been building for so incredibly long.

I whimpered as he pulled away, kissing my neck, sucking it hard before licking away the tightness he produced. "When we finally get to do this, lover, don't let me hurt you. You've created a monster inside me."

"I want you, I don't care if it hurts," I panted, grasping tighter to his hand as he pulled further away.

He shook his head and exhaled slowly, tightening his tie and adjusting his erection as he increased the distance between us. "That's my girl…"

And then he turned the corner.

That was five hours ago, and no matter how many different ways I'd found to pleasure myself, there was still an ache deep inside my body that only he could alleviate. I could still feel him on me, but it wasn't deep enough. He only scratched the surface, and everything inside of me itched for his skin, his tongue…

I pressed play on the video of us again. It fascinated me. He turned me into this sexy, wanton woman. I needed to feel that again, he couldn't expect us to keep on going like this, so wound up and aching for something only we could relieve when we came together.

A short melodic ping interrupted my intense concentration on our video together, and I reluctantly stopped it to see who was attempting to contact me at this time of night.

Five words.

My salvation.

_Call me if you're alone._

I climbed out of bed, wrapping my knee length robe around my naked body and sipping the last of my wine from the goblet. We'd never talked outside of work before. An occasional dirty text, promising delicious things the following day at work was about as far as we'd ever gone.

But things were so different now.

What once was a fun, sexy fling had quickly turned into a necessity; it wasn't an option anymore. I was his to do as he pleased with, and I fucking loved it.

I stood by my window, watching the clouds push rapidly past the bright moon that came and went out of view. His voice would wreck me, but I so looked forward to the shattering sensation he produced. I hovered the cursor over his name and hit send…and bit my lip to suppress my smile when he answered on the first ring.

"Hey."

A shuddering sigh was my only reply. He took that as his cue to continue, his voice straining as he talked in hushed, frantic words.

"Have you ever desired like this?"

"You want to know what I desire?" I whispered breathlessly.

"Tell me."

"Your pleasure, your voice praising me when I make you feel good, your sounds when I know I'm driving you wild. Ever since you recorded me…I can focus on nothing but the hunger in your eyes. I want to be yours, Carlisle. I want to be your good girl…"

"Jesus fucking Christ," he growled, his fist coming down hard against something in the background. "Let me come over, lover. I'll make good on what I started in the hallway earlier. You want it hard, you'll fucking get it hard, but you need to tell me what you want _now."_

I pressed my palm against my forehead, my heart pounding inside my chest as he offered himself to me. "Do you know where I live?"

"Yes," he answered immediately.

"Then please…_please…_now, I can't wait."

He disconnected our call with a darkly whispered curse, a slight whimper of desperation lacing his profanity before he left me in silence.

It was too much to take. I collapsed on the bed behind me and waited, shivering with anticipation and praying I would survive the moments before he was heavy, hot and warm on top of me.

**-x-x-**

Somehow I'd managed to find my way from the bed to my front door, waiting in frantic eagerness for a knock, a doorbell, a _feeling_…anything to signal his arrival.

One knock, one deep call of my name and the lock was released. I began shaking ferociously as he pushed the door open, letting it land loudly against the wall as he took me in. His eyes were wild, his chest heaving as he ripped his black leather jacket off of his body and kicked the door closed behind him. He grunted as his hands landed on either side of my waist, lifting me from the ground and pushing me backwards with his body on mine until I was perched on the back of the couch.

His hands were clumsy as he tore my robe from me, the fabric stinging against my skin as he pulled and ripped it until I was naked in front of him. He was panting so hard, his hair mussed as he reached behind him and pulled his white t-shirt off by the back of his collar, then popping the button of his jeans with his thumb.

When he was relieved of his shirt and his pants were loosened, he dragged two fingers up my slit, pushing them into his mouth and grunting primitively as he licked my fluid off of his skin. Tears were burning hot as seconds passed by in what seemed like lifetimes. After he removed every ounce of me from his fingers, his hands were at my hips again, fingertips leaving eager bruises as he lifted me and flipped me, folding me in half over the back of the couch and pushing my ass in the air. He could do anything to me this way. I wanted him to do _everything_, exactly this fucking way.

I felt his thighs press against my own, the rough fabric of his jeans bringing about sensations that made me shiver. I cried out loudly as I felt the head of his cock slipping into my pussy, then pulling back out and dragging along the crack of my ass, making me wet everywhere. "Fuck," I moaned as he curled my hair around his fist and pulled, causing my back to arch up while he finally thrust all the way inside me with one abrupt pump of his hips.

He still held my hair as his forehead pushed against his fist, his grunts sounding like a pained cry as he held me still with one palm spread out across my lower back. He fucked me ruthlessly, so fucking hard, deeper than he'd ever been, but it wasn't enough. I felt his dull nails in my skin, his dragging fingers leaving red marks that I wanted to remain forever on my body. Every time he grunted like the animal I had reduced him to, it made every inch of me throb, my clit rubbing against the upholstery of the couch with every frantic thrust he gave me. He slapped my ass and I came violently, screaming his name as I collapsed into the couch cushions, the pillows muffling my desperate cries as I flailed against his cock. He paid no attention to my spasms, grabbing my ass with both hands and pinning me down as he fucked me hard, so fucking hard that the couch was moving across the room, knocking into the coffee table, tipping it, spilling everything, and fuck me, _it wasn't enough_.

Before I knew what was happening he grabbed my forearms, lurching me up from my resting place and pulling me until I was arched for him once more. He took both of my wrists in one large hand, the other squeezing my breast, twisting my nipple until it burned so fucking good. The hair on his chest rubbed against my back as we undulated against each other, and his teeth captured my earlobe as he poured his groans of pleasure into my ear. "All night," he promised roughly. "I haven't even fucking begun, you just don't know, Bella."

"_Please_…" I cried, his thrusts getting more urgent as the couch raised up on two legs while he pounded me. I was so weak, my body vibrating with so much pleasure that it was more than I could take. He bit my neck and slapped my breast heard, my back aching as I fought to get closer to him.

With a loud, pained groan he pushed me down again, my arms grasping the cushions for dear life as he slid noisily out of my body and came all over my back. His warm fluid covering my skin made me even wetter, and I pleaded for him as I felt his semi-hard cock resting against the back of my thigh. "You're close, lover." He was panting so hard he could barely get his words out. He sunk two fingers into me from behind, curling them and twisting them as I shook from his force. I felt him rubbing his cum into my skin with his other hand, groaning as my orgasm began building. Short, high-pitched cries left my mouth as the sweat poured down my temple, sanity falling way to the pleasure he created as he staked his claim on my body.

I came hard on his fingers, my moans turning to sobs at the intensity of my climax and the way his warm fingers felt thrumming inside my body. Every breath was a whimper as he pulled out of me, rubbing my back languidly with the hand that fucked me and combining our juices as they covered my skin. I barely murmured his name as he leaned over me, kissing the back of my neck and lifting me carefully from my perch over the back of the couch. My back cracked as he lifted me bridal style, looking down at me with a mixture of amusement and awe. "Feel okay?" he whispered.

I nodded, my head lolling slightly before settling against the crook of his neck. "We're going to see stars tonight, lover," he whispered against my forehead, pressing his warm lips there as he walked toward my bedroom and gingerly laid me down.

At this point I didn't know if this was fantasy or reality, but I did know that I never wanted it to end.

I watched him through hooded eyes as he stood at my bedside, sliding his dark jeans over his muscular thighs, kicking off his shoes as he went. Then his socks, then his thumbs hooking inside black boxer-briefs and yet he still never took his eyes off of mine.

He knelt onto the bed and hovered over me, laying most of his weight on top of me as he pushed his face into the crook of my neck. "You're a sight for sore eyes, Bella," he murmured, his breath hitching as our bodies aligned, every inch of our exposed flesh rubbing together as we moved.

Glory Box by Portishead began playing, and only then did I realize my iPod was still playing away in the corner of my bedroom. He hummed against my shoulder, his hands running up the sides of my body until his thumbs were circling my nipples slowly, gently. "What have you been doing tonight, lover?" he whispered, dragging his stubbled chin along my collar bone before licking me there. His eyes met mine and they made my heart stop. He was so unbelievably beautiful that it hurt to take him in sometimes. Even though we only came together for sex alone, I felt like I knew a part of him that no one else did.

And I hated myself for wanting him to belong to me like I did him. We were just sex. Nothing else…

"Do you really want to know?" I smirked, leaning my head forward in a silent plea for a kiss.

He hummed deeply, keeping our kiss chaste but intimate as he squeezed my bottom lip securely between his. "Every detail, lover."

"I came home, had a light dinner and a glass of wine, watched our video, took a shower and came on the showerhead, wishing it was your mouth…"

He exhaled shakily before dragging his chin between my breasts, turning his head to the side to suck the soft skin into his mouth, tasting everything but my nipple. "What else?"

"I talked on the phone to people who don't matter…tried to watch TV to take my mind off of your cock but that didn't work, so I watched our video again. And I made myself cum, but it did nothing for me. I was still aching for you."

The tip of his tongue pressed against my nipple, his eyes searching mine before he sucked it hard into his mouth. The sensation of feeling all of him against me was unlike anything I'd ever experienced. We'd never come together outside of the hospital before, so anytime we found the opportunity to fuck, we were typically clothed and rushing to find our release.

What would happen now that we had all night long to explore each other?

A burning question remained in the back of my mind, but I refused to acknowledge it. Where was the blonde, plastic woman he called his wife? No, jaded girlfriend's on the side asked questions like that. He was just my pleasure, I didn't need anything else from him.

"You've needed me all night?" he whispered against my puckered nipple, letting his teeth scrape against it while waiting for my reply.

I nodded, feeling vulnerable over what I was about to admit. "I've needed you more and more…it's like every day, all I can focus on is the way you make me feel when you look at me like that. Like you want to devour me. I need it, all the time."

He crawled up my body until his lips were brushing against my own, not kissing but merely touching mine as he spoke. "Do you think it's any different for me?"

"I…I don't know," I confessed, spreading my legs wider until I could feel his awakening cock pressing against the place I needed him most.

"How could you not know, Bella?" he asked me sincerely, our eyes connected deeply as we stared, an emotion filling his soft green that terrified me as much as it exhilarated me. I could sense the moment he felt it there, because he quickly masked it with his desire for me. "You're my fuck-toy, lover. I always want you on my dick, and tonight is no exception. But I want you to feed me first, I've been fantasizing about your pussy on my tongue all fucking week."

He flipped me abruptly, switching our positions on the bed until I was straddling his stomach, his conceited, beautiful smirk back in place as he smoldered up at me. "Come on," he whispered, taking my hands as I shimmied up his body until my thighs were on either side of his head. "Are you still weak, baby?"

I was still lightheaded from the pounding he had given me over the couch, but I could feel his breath on my pussy and I needed another fucking release in only the way he could give me. He took my hesitation as my reply and lifted my hands until they were wrapped around the wrought-iron headboard, then steadying my hips tightly in his grip. "Just hold on, you won't fall. Now listen, you're going to set that beautiful pink pussy right on my tongue, and then you're going to ride me, Bella. I want you to cum in my mouth until you collapse. And then I'll catch you. And then I'll fuck you. Do you understand me?"

My eyes fluttered closed as I swallowed thickly, wetness pooling in between my legs and coming dangerously close to his awaiting lips. I looked down into his eyes and I understood exactly what he needed me to do. He wanted me to be selfish now. I was always so concerned with what I was doing for him, the pleasure I gave him. He wanted me to concentrate on everything he gave me…just for tonight. "I understand," I whispered, running my thumb along his plump bottom lip, then running it through my wetness and over his lip once more.

He growled against my thumb, lapping at it before lifting me up and bringing my center closer to his mouth. "Fuck my mouth, take everything, lover."

My fingers tensed around the headboard as I lowered myself onto him, the hot wetness of his mouth sending a jolt of pleasure straight through my body. He loved tasting me, and I loved how enthusiastic he was over sucking and biting me into mind-altering orgasms, but we'd never done it like this. He was always so determined to remain in charge of our trysts, but tonight, he was giving me the reins.

I started off slow, letting the wetness of my pussy and his tongue glide together effortlessly in smooth, small undulations. His fingers dug into my skin, encouraging me to take more from him. I groaned deeply as my head fell forward, my heavy eyes taking in his dark messy hair and the thin sheen of sweat that was forming on his brow. "Bella, take it!" he demanded sharply against my swollen skin, slapping my ass and gripping me firmly until I finally let go, thrusting my hips harder, frantically sliding over his face, his stubble providing the perfect sting that was only bringing me closer to the edge.

I let myself surrender to the pleasure, my mind vacant of anything but our noises, my need, my throbbing pussy and how much I desired the man I was riding. I let out a grunt that closely resembled a cry, releasing one hand from the headboard and burying the other in Carlisle's hair, pulling it hard and guiding him as I rode his tongue rigorously. I felt rejuvenated, light as a feather as he lapped at my heated flesh, swallowing down my arousal and everything he made me feel. "I'm gonna cum," I whimpered, sliding harder against his mouth, pushing deeper and moaning as his teeth nipped against my lips. He grunted beneath me and sucked me as I rode him, the added pressure sending me hurtling over the edge as I screamed out his name, my thrusts random and jerking as I pushed against him, pulsing on his tongue as he fucked me with it.

I felt wild and uninhibited, pushing through my intense orgasm and not stopping as I took more from him. His moans became higher instead of deep and guttural, signifying just how much he was enjoying my liberation. His fingers were pressed so tightly to me, the mattress crying out loudly in protest as I took him on the bed. I thought of nothing but my wet pussy and his hot tongue and this need, the fucking need we were finally feeding.

He spread my cheeks and tongued me deep, his tongue hard as my sliding soon became a frantic bounce on his mouth. It was too much, I was losing my mind as he held me against him, taking back some of my dominance because it was crushing me. I came once more and it made me choke, my breath lodged in my throat at the powerful shudder it sent ricocheting throughout my body. "Please, Carlisle," I begged, thighs shaking around his head as he clawed his way down my back, encouraging me with his deep hums vibrating into my pussy.

"More," he demanded. "One more and I'll fuck you so goddamn good, baby. Come on!"

"Fuck," I cried, abandoning the headboard and gripping the pillow on either side of his head as I spread my legs wider, moving so fast, working towards something so colossal, I wasn't quite sure I'd survive it. The madness he created inside me was lethal, it was all-consuming and I had no way to define it. It frightened me and yet I never wanted it to end.

I was so close again, the deep ache inside my belly crackling and popping until it burned inside my body. I knew this climax would be painful when it unleashed, but I also knew it would send me into the utmost euphoria. He did this, he gave me heaven and hell, he sent me to a world I didn't even know existed and I wanted it all the time. I didn't want to wait until the hospital was slow or he had a spare moment to unzip his pants.

There was something more and we wouldn't allow ourselves to feel it. We wouldn't allow ourselves to give in because it was bigger than us. "Oh God…"

I came brutally once more, my body officially giving up as I fell backwards, not knowing or caring where I was landing because I couldn't endure it anymore. He caught me just like he promised, lowering me to the bed and covering me quicker than realistically possible.

He held my tired legs to my chest, pushing them tightly as he entered me with one delectably long groan of pleasure. He folded me like a pretzel as he had his way with my body, his cock so engorged inside me that I could barely handle his length. We were all sweat and slippery skin, desperate cries and frantic movements. I felt as if I were having an out of body experience, watching from above as the muscles in his back flexed and heaved, his narrow hips swiveling and pumping my body into submission.

I blindly reached up and wrapped my fingers around the back of his neck, his damp hair twisting in between my fingers as he pounded me down into the bed, his breaths coming out as deep growls. Tears burned my eyes and fell across my lashes, the overwhelming sensations becoming too much for me to take. He saw them and leaned down, licking the salty water from my temple, his mouth smelling and tasting exactly like me. I moaned desperately, so satisfied to know that it was _my_ scent covering the man that gave me all of this.

He stopped suddenly, lips parted drastically as he panted, a drip of sweat balancing on the tip of his nose before it landed on my chin. I rubbed it into me, his eyes indescribable as he leaned back on his haunches and took one of my legs in each hand. He carefully laid them on the bed, his fingers soothing my sore muscles gently before he fell over me, forearms on either side of my head and his sticky chest pressed tightly against mine. He reached down and grabbed his cock, sliding it up and down my pussy before pushing it inside.

I slid my arms beneath his and held onto his muscular back, bringing him closer as my tear-soaked eyes fell shut, his forehead landing heavily on mine. His hips swiveled against my own, not pumping in and out of me but moving inside me, never leaving my warmth. The fervor of our movements had slowed quite significantly, the room silent except for the quiet music in the background, the wet sounds of our bodies moving together and our heaving breaths. My chest felt like it would explode with something else, something real, and I did everything in my power to hold it inside.

I didn't know what would happen if I set it free, and I just wasn't ready to find out.

He kissed me sweetly, delicately, his tongue dragging heavily over mine as it tangled and swept as if each and every one of his movements were calculated. His hips were slow, his cock pulsing and his lips swollen as they covered my chin, my cheeks, my eyelids. His stubble across my soft skin was pure ecstasy, his slow movements so meticulous that I couldn't decide which I liked more, the frenzy we had created or the gentleness that soon followed.

It was suffocating me, it was just too much. "Carlisle," I whispered, my eyes rolling back into my head as his cock pushed into me in just the right spot.

"I can't control the way I need you, Bella," he confessed in a strained murmur, sliding in and out of me with more force now, his hips moving haphazardly as they continued their rapid pace. "Let me cum inside."

I nodded frantically against his forehead, eager for his hot cum to fill me up. I wanted everything he could ever give me.

His hips came down on me hard, a steady slapping of our skin resounding throughout the room as he whimpered desperately into my ear. "Please…" I stilled at the word; he'd never said it to me before, but I knew what he wanted. His hand came between our bodies, his fingers massaging me so fucking hard, my clit so swollen and aching I didn't know if I had it in me to give him one more.

But all I wanted was to be his good girl.

Every time he came down hard on me, I'd push back up, making the pleasure sting with the force. "Cum," he begged me, kissing my ear and sliding his lips down my jaw until our tongues were tangling. "You have to cum on me, lover. I'll lose my shit if you don't. I fucking need it, Bella."

His words were enough to make me do exactly that, and I tightened my grip on him as we moved swiftly together, his breaths becoming shorter and his groans becoming higher until I exploded on him, gripping him so fucking tight through my climax that I nearly pushed him out of me. He held steady, pumping frantically into me until he released, hot, wet, spurting, _mine_…

He fell on top of me, his skin stuck to mine, chests heaving, breaths not even close to being caught. We laid there for so long, trying to come back down from the high we inflicted upon one another. After awhile I felt him lifting me, lowering my head to the pillow as he moved in behind me, not bothering to cover us with the sheets. I smiled as he wrapped his arms around me, remembering our first encounter, how he spooned me in the on-call room bed, promising all the ways he'd make me see God.

We'd been intense from the first moment we gave into this need.

"I didn't realize you were such a cuddler," I teased, pushing back into him and sighing contentedly.

He chuckled, biting my shoulder playfully. "Usually I'm not, but I figured someone had to hold you together after I so thoroughly rocked your world."

I slapped his thigh, rolling my eyes at his egotistical comment. He took a deep breath and kissed my neck, reaching over me until he grabbed my phone off the bedside table. My phone came to life, our video paused where I'd left it when he'd texted me earlier that night. "Hmm, you were watching this before you called me."

"I told you I was."

He hit play, holding it for both of us to see as he rested his chin against the crook of my neck. "Do you see what I see?" he whispered, his thumb tracing the screen as he squeezed me tighter.

"What?"

"Perfection. You are literally the most beautiful thing I've ever seen, lover."

I turned in his arms, meeting his eyes carefully. It was exhausting to balance upon this precipice, close to admitting something that terrified us both, yet suppressing it to the point that we felt like we'd both burst.

I didn't have to speculate any longer. The moments when his eyes shined with the truth was something I could no longer deny.

"Why did you come here tonight?" I murmured.

He linked our fingers together, his tongue dragging along the inside of my wrist before he kissed me gently there. "Because my dick demanded it."

Another moment lost.

I smiled, grabbing him and moving to lay on top of him. "He's mine," I whispered.

"You're right about that, lover," he murmured softly.

I squealed as he lifted me from the bed, throwing me over his shoulder and slapping my ass. "What are you doing?"

"We're showering…you got us all sticky."

"Yeah, it was all me," I grumbled in mock annoyance.

"Are you tired?" he questioned, setting me down carefully once we were inside the bathroom.

I shook my head, a coy smile covering my lips and for some reason I couldn't quite meet his eyes.

He smiled widely, his eyes searching the floor as his hand slid beneath my hair and wrapped around the back of my neck. "I don't want to waste it, Bella."

I nodded, swallowing heavily as he reached down to start the water.

"You won't walk tomorrow," he chuckled, shaking his head.

I knew it was true.

And for every ache that filled my body tomorrow, I'd carry the memory of Carlisle Cullen on top of me, beneath me, behind me…and it would all be worth it.

It always was.


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns any Twilight characters and Twilight plot lines that may appear in this story. The remainder is my original work. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without my express written authorization.**

Red Light Special – Part Three

**BPOV**

One blinding ray of light snuck in between the slightly parted blinds, waking me from a sleep that was deep and one hundred percent satisfying. I stretched my arms, feeling aches and pains in every part of my body and forgetting for only a moment who had put them there. Once I remembered, my heart ached…and it scared me.

I shut my eyes tightly, memories from the night before rushing back to me faster than I could comprehend them. His skin, his kisses, his frantic thrusts and the smooth gentle swiveling of his hips. The fire in his eyes and the gentleness he no longer fought to hide by the fifth time he'd entered my body. Sleep found us only moments after he came inside me that final time. God, it couldn't have even been two hours ago.

I kept my eyes shut because I couldn't feel him in the bed next to me. His skin wasn't on mine, his words weren't hot and heavy in my ear and I couldn't bear for it not to be there. I couldn't bear the fact that I wanted it to be.

Last night changed everything.

Fucking everything.

And then a fingertip along my spine. I froze. I held my breath. I kept my eyes closed because I knew anything he'd greet me with would destroy me. A devilish glare, confirming what I already knew – I was his fuck toy. A gentle longing for more, a look that I craved even though I couldn't bring myself to admit it.

Slowly up and down his finger slid, until warm lips followed each bump, until soft hair sent tingles throughout my body as he tasted up and down my back. _Please don't break me_, I silently begged.

He flipped me over and hovered above me, fully clothed, denim and leather and cotton pressed into naked skin as he knelt on either side of my open thighs, forearms trapping my shoulders and nose against my nose, lips against my lips. Heart against my heart.

I shifted beneath him, wincing slightly because he worked me out so thoroughly last night. His brow furrowed in concern, and I finally took in his eyes. His sweet eyes. His wary eyes. His 'I don't want this to end' eyes. And then I kissed him the way everything inside me said to.

His moan was like a sigh of relief.

I gripped his hair and pinned his lips to mine, letting them have a brief moment of respite after denying them the truth for so long. He spoke my name almost frantically between urgent push and pulls of our lips, his fingertips gentle on my body because he knew I would barely be able to move, let alone walk today. He promised me that.

Words scared me, but I had so many on the tip of my tongue. I was letting it pour out of me. This wasn't just fucking. This was so much more and he was here now, he was here, over me and in my bed and he was showing me the way he felt with sweet, sweet kisses and gentle hands.

And just as my lips were about to form words that would change everything from here on out, he broke away, pushing his forehead against my shoulder and breathing haggardly. His hands were no longer gentle as they slid beneath my back, lifted me off of the bed and crushed me to his body. He spoke my name and he was pleading. Begging with an intensity that had my stomach in knots and my heart hammering like a drum.

He was like a frightened wild animal, on the cusp of trusting but always, always wary. If he left me now, if the look in his eyes suddenly became masked…I didn't know if I'd survive the heartache it would cause.

My fingers dug into his hair with both hands, scratching along his scalp and pulling the tendrils gently as I did everything I could to keep him from pushing me away because of his fear. "Carlisle, just listen to me, okay? I'm not asking…for anything. There's no pressure. You know how we fit, it's just us and this is our release, okay? I just need to make you feel good, I need to be your good girl." Tears ran down my cheeks as I spoke the all too familiar words. Words I promised him when I was nothing but a fuck to him.

He cursed sharply and lifted his head from my shoulder, eyes telling me everything even though his jaw was tense and his features were hardened. "Don't say that…to me now, Bella. I don't… I don't know what I'm even…_fuck_!"

He clambered off of me then, one hand firmly in his hair as he paced the length of my bedroom and then made a beeline toward the door. I sat up, putting my feet on the floor, my heart beginning to splinter as I accepted his departure. But just as quickly as he left, he came charging back toward me, falling to his knees and pushing his face against my bare thighs, holding me so tight that it ached in the most perfect way.

"I'm trying to think so rationally right now, Bella. Trying to say what makes sense, but I have nothing. All I can say to you is that leaving right now is taking more effort than anything, _anything_ I've ever experienced. Did I…was coming here last night a mistake?"

My hands made soothing passes through his hair until my fingers traced his jaw, cupping his face in one hand as I swallowed thickly. "This was always under the surface, just waiting."

He looked so deeply into my eyes. Minutes passed, and he kept on searching, melding into them, speaking silent words he just couldn't voice.

And then he got up and walked out of my apartment without another look in my direction.

**-x-x-**

Three weeks later, I found myself somewhere I knew I shouldn't have been.

In fact, I should have skipped this night altogether. Nothing good was going to come of it, I _knew_ that. And yet I remained at the table in that dimly lit bar. I surrounded myself with my co-workers as we drank and laughed and ate cake because Doctor Carter had decided to retire. A going away party for a man I had barely said two words to since I'd started at Mercy, and here I was, eating his cake.

I felt like I had no right.

And still I did shots with my fellow residents. I acted like a twenty-something woman for once in my life instead of a prisoner to my career. I focused on acting my age because I had to. Because, if I focused on Carlisle Cullen at the corner table, sipping whiskey with his arm artfully dangled over petite shoulders, I was sure to do something I'd regret.

I never thought he'd actually bring her.

Or maybe I did.

It hadn't even been a month since we surrendered to ourselves in the middle of the night and altered the unspoken arrangement we'd had since we started sleeping together. He'd kissed me slow, looked at me with something more…it wasn't just a rough fuck from behind anymore, and it had frightened us both.

Jake was now gone. And I didn't break up with him because I was obsessed with an unattainable man. I did it because it made me sick to kiss his lips and promise that I loved him. He wasn't right for me, he was stifling me into being someone that I never ever was.

I didn't tell Carlisle that Jake was out of the picture for several reasons. One, because we never would have talked about anything other than how hard I wanted it or how hungry I was for his cock. But mainly, it was because, up until one week ago, he had ignored me ever since he walked out of my apartment that fateful morning where so much was left unsaid. Not a word, not a touch, not a kiss or a suck or a bite. I kept a straight face around him, balling my hands into fists so he wouldn't see them tremble when he passed. I never cried because I fucking refused to. I wouldn't breathe when he was around me because inhaling his scent would make me hit my knees from its intensity. So instead I blocked myself off just like he was blocking himself from me. I wouldn't speculate over why he didn't want me, why he felt the need to distance himself after what we experienced in my apartment that night.

I was on a graveyard shift when he'd finally surrendered to it all, a mere six days ago. It was so quiet on the floor, barely staffed on a typical Sunday evening when he grabbed my upper arm so tightly I could feel the black and blue his fingers were pushing into my skin.

I let him drag me like a caveman, his expression almost murderous as he opened an abandoned exam room door and unceremoniously tossed me inside. Nothing about our encounter scared me, because I knew this man would never cause me harm. I shook in anticipation, hummed from the sensation of his hands on me when I'd been yearning for his touch for so long, and gasped as he stood a foot away from me, staring like I was either the devil incarnate or his own personal savior.

With him, I could never be sure.

His arms were crossed, fingers stroking his chin, his breathing wild as his eyes burned red-hot into mine. Perhaps he wanted it to come off as anger, but I knew it was his passion building up, the pain of trying to suppress something monumental that was taking its toll emotionally and physically.

There was so much we probably should have said to one another. Confessions that we both deserved to hear. Instead, I took the heaviness away, took the words and the need and the emotion that he clearly wasn't ready to deal with. I wanted to save him, because he was _mine_ to save.

All I wanted was for him to feel _good_. Relief. A hungry pleasure that only I could provide him.

I'd save my love for another day.

I didn't possess the strength to deny myself the truth any longer.

I'd silently backed up against the exam table, not taking my eyes from his as I hopped up and straddled the narrow surface. He was so incredibly on edge, every inch of his body humming like a livewire as he waited to see what I would do. He seemed anxious about what my next move would be, but I was intent on keeping my feelings buried for his sake.

I slid my hand down my chest, squeezing my left breast and twisting my nipple through my scrub top before sliding it down my stomach, my fingers dipping below the waistband of my pants until they met hot, wet skin.

I rubbed myself in slow circles, watching the fear leave his eyes and the dominance take its place. And a silent thank you was there as well. He was so grateful that I spared him the truth of the matter for another day. "Well…" I had a hard time keeping my voice even as his arms unfolded from his chest. "Did you bring me in here to stare all night, or are you going to get over here and fuck me?"

He was on me then, hard and frantic, grabbing my ass, squeezing it so fucking hard, pushing and pulling my body just like I needed. "I thought you were my good girl? Keep on with this fucking attitude and I'll put my cock down your throat to shut you up. Or was that your plan all along?"

I'd whimpered as his fingers flexed around my throat with the perfect amount of pressure, his index finger sliding along my mouth until I took it inside and sucked.

He chuckled darkly and bit my neck before pulling away, standing right in front of me and gesturing to the floor in front of him. "Get it. Put my cock in your mouth. Suck it hard, lover…and don't you fucking make me wait another second."

His words made me shudder in desperate need.

I never knew eroticism such as this even existed.

_Suck it hard, lover…_

"Bella, another shot!"

Ben Cheney's drunken booming voice interrupted my memories of that night, and I gritted my teeth before accepting the glass. My eyes were hard as I glanced over toward Carlisle and his wife. She was laughing at Dr. Carter's nineteen-year-old girlfriend as she spoke to them animatedly. Probably about her trashy co-ed roommates or her 'totally epic' spring break, and why the hell was sixty-year-old Carter fucking a teenager anyway?

Disgusting.

Just then, the other female at the table caught my attention.

I watched the way _her_ hand landed against her throat, her fruity cocktail balancing in the other hand as she smiled. Her face barely moved, flawless, lacking character, blank, generic, nothing like him.

_She was nothing like him._

I swallowed thickly, bringing the shot glass closer to my mouth just as his eyes pulled mine away from his wife. His expression was unreadable as I let the burn of tequila coat my bottom lip. "Cheers," I whispered, drinking it all in one gulp and slamming it down against the table.

I looked away without another thought.

"Do you want to dance?" Angela asked me in a slurred, chiming voice. She was the introvert of our little resident posse, so I knew she had to have been hammered to suggest something like that. Instead of answering, I took the untouched shot that was sitting in front of her and downed that as well.

Nothing good was going to come from this night.

I just fucking knew it.

Time went on, and the tequila came more prominently. If Ben wasn't fucking Angela on the sly I would have thought he was trying to get me drunk. Either way, the fuzzier the alcohol made my brain, the lighter my body felt.

"Angela, why don't we wish Dr. Carter good luck?"

She looked at me quizzically. "I don't think he even knows who we are, Bella. Besides, he's been holed up with Cullen and his bombshell wife all night."

Her words dragged across my skin like nails on a chalkboard. "No, we shouldn't be antisocial. After all, we're drinking at his open bar and eating his farewell food. We're going over there." I slammed the rest of my beer and grabbed her hand. She let out a squeak as I pulled her right off the stool, my eyes burning hot on the side of his face where his dimple showed when he smiled.

It did nothing but piss me off.

I played it cool as we approached the table. Angela had no qualms about showing just how drunk she was, and I didn't necessarily blame her. It was well past one a.m. and the majority of the attending hospital staff was taking advantage of a rare night of refreshment and enjoying themselves. The entire scene was loud, music sultry, bodies dancing and grinding to the beat. Initially I was surprised that a going away party for a senior citizen was going to be at this bar, but then I met his toddler girlfriend and…well…that explained that.

Carter turned to us as we approached, his eyes nothing more than drunken slits as he grinned at us salaciously. "Hello girls," he yelled over the music.

Angela waved but said nothing as her hips began swaying to the beat, and I soon realized I was alone in this. "Doctor Carter, we just wanted to wish you good luck. You'll definitely be missed at Mercy."

Despite how drunk I was, my words came out smoothly with a hint of professionalism, and I was almost viewing this as a social experiment now.

What would the gorgeous man do when the woman he was fucking and his wife breathed the same air? How would he control his passion for his little _fuck toy_ when he so obviously belonged to me and felt nothing for her?

Maybe I wasn't acting as smoothly as I'd thought.

Carter's hand rested on my shoulder and slid slowly down my arm until his fingers enclosed my wrist. I would have been recoiling in disgust if it wasn't for the look of rage on Carlisle's face. His jaw clenched as he stared at the spot where Carter was touching me, and as his angry eyes met mine, I shiver of need ran through my body.

He was flaunting his wife in front of me, making me feel like a fool, and yet he had just proven that despite all that, I'd do anything for him. I'd fuck him whenever he demanded, get on my knees whenever he pleased…because I was too far into this not to.

What kind of a person did that make me?

I looked around quickly and snapped myself out of it, taking in the angry glare of Carter's girlfriend. I laughed and pried myself out of his grip, holding out a hand to the girl and introducing myself. She was semi-cordial to me after that, and with a smile, I looked Carlisle in the eye. "Hi Doctor Cullen, is this your wife?"

He blinked at me, giving me the look he usually gave right before he told me what piece of furniture he wanted me bent over. At least he had the good sense to remove his hand from _her_ shoulder before we approached them. "Yes, Doctor Swan, this is my wife."

The words stung deep inside me, and I didn't know if I wanted to punch his perfect face or let him fuck me until I passed out. I couldn't handle those words. I just couldn't.

I held out my hand and she took it, smiling and introducing herself, not having a clue that when he gave her two pumps and a pat on the head, he was fantasizing about being buried inside of _me._

I had no room for guilt. She could smile to my face all she wanted to, but I knew what she was about. She was so fucking transparent she gave glass a run for its money. She was so intent on being a doctor's wife that she didn't give a shit about who Carlisle was, how good he was, how hard death hit him when no one was looking and how brilliant he could be day in and day out.

She valued his pretty face and hefty fucking paycheck.

This was all too much to feel, and suddenly I was so warm that I couldn't breathe. I looked behind me to see that Angela had retreated at some point and was now grinding up on Ben on the dance floor. I rubbed my throat that suddenly felt constricted, heat spiraling throughout my body as the music and loudness began closing in on me.

"Are you all right, dear?" Carter questioned, taking it as an excuse to touch me again as his hand caressed my bare shoulder.

I nodded and swallowed thickly, backing away from the table and smiling as genuinely as I could manage. "I'm fine. I just need a little air. Well, good luck again. I hope you all have a good night."

I couldn't meet Carlisle's eyes because I felt the concern there. The remorse. The need. Everything he relied on me to ignore.

I couldn't anymore.

I pushed through the crowd of bodies until I hit the back of the club, sliding out the back door and down the steps until my forehead was against the cool brick of the building. It was so dark. Voices in the distance were the only company I had and I knew it was stupid for me to be out here all alone.

I could feel the pulsating beats of the music from the inside push into my skin through the wall, making my heart race that much faster from the heaviness of it. I didn't know what kind of panic attack this was, but I felt like I needed to run. Run until my lungs were burning, my sides aching…until he was far away from me and the reality of this situation was even further, left behind me by miles of pavement.

It was then that I realized I couldn't do this any longer.

I refused to.

I held the tears inside me, determined not to let them spill as my fists clenched against the wall, the brick cutting into my knuckles and easing some of the pain that was ripping me open from the inside out.

Damn the alcohol coursing through my veins. I'd never have felt so much if I wasn't so intoxicated. I wouldn't be like this.

I let out a breathless cry as I felt something warm and solid push up against my back, and I knew it was him before my instincts had the time to be alarmed.

I felt like I would crawl out of my skin as he held me there, trapped against him. The last place I wanted to be but the only place I needed. His breath was warm and heavy against my ear, the scent of whiskey wafting across my cheek and invading my senses.

I closed my eyes tightly, willing myself to pretend that this was all just a dream. I wasn't in the throes of an emotional breakdown. I wasn't pushing against a man in a dark alley whose wife was surely seconds away from discovering us. I wasn't shuddering as his breath hit my skin, body to body, a dark little secret in the middle of the night.

My name on his lips proved to me that this was entirely, irrevocably real.

"Bella…"

He didn't have to say another word. Not a single one. He said it all with my name, the intonations of his voice and the brush of his bottom lip sliding across my earlobe.

His husky whispering stirred something deep inside me, not just need but a sense of belonging, and as the first tear spilled from my eye and down my cheek, I knew it would be impossible to keep them hidden any longer.

"Goddamnit," I whispered, pushing my forehead against the wall as the tears streamed out of me.

My despair triggered a reaction out of him that I truly didn't expect. He didn't apologize. He didn't wipe my tears or beg me not to cry.

Instead, with a grunt, he drove both of his fists into the brick wall on either side of my head, and rested his forehead against the back of my neck. I began trembling from the intensity of it all, his breathing strained and unforgiving as it tickled and moved my hair against his lips.

"Do you think this is easy for me?" he rasped.

A jagged cry fell from my lips as I blindly reached behind me to grab the lapel of his jacket, yanking him forward until his body was crushing me into the wall. His cheek was against my cheek, his words frantic, hot and fast in the bubble of desperation we had created in that vacant alley.

"Every. Fucking. Day. I have to see you, talk to you, work with you… I have to watch as you make the sick and injured breathe a sigh of relief. I watch them stare at you with hope, smile at you because it's impossible not to. I see the men fall over themselves because you're just so fucking beautiful, Bella. And I'm supposed to feel _nothing_. I'm supposed to do _nothing_. I'm supposed to pretend that the honor of having you accept me inside your body means nothing more than a fucking _orgasm_. I need…I _need_ to make you believe that you are nothing more than that because the alternative…" he drifted off, cursing as he pressed his lips into my hair and whispered his confession against my scalp. "Because the alternative scares the shit out of me. I don't know how to feel this way, I need you to understand that."

I didn't say a word, only tilted my head until my lips were against his knuckles, kissing the blood that pooled on them from his assault on the wall.

His lips moved to my temple, his body wound so tight as his fingers flexed against the brick. "I'm the asshole who cheats on his wife, Bella. I fuck young, sexy residents like yourself because _I can_. I get off whenever and wherever I choose, because being inside of the woman I'm married to is barely enough to keep my dick hard. _That's_ who I am."

I shook my head slowly. "You want me to believe that's who you are. I know better."

He chuckled harshly. "You really think you're the first woman I've lured into the on-call room?"

I scoffed. "I'm not an idiot, Carlisle."

"Then why do you insist on sticking up for me when you know exactly who I am?"

His sharp words were cutting through me, my stomach doing somersaults as I swallowed down the bile rising in my throat. "You haven't touched anyone besides me and your wife since we started this. I _know_ that. I know it." I fought to keep the waver out of my voice, and when he gave no response, I continued. "Your reputation preceded you, Carlisle. I knew what you were. I knew what you wanted. And from the very second you tried to convince me that I was nothing more than your _fuck_, I knew the truth. Maybe you were a whore before we came together. Maybe you've treated your wife like shit. Maybe she's amazing and doesn't deserve a single bit of your infidelity. All I know is what I see in your eyes when you gaze at me like I'm your fucking _salvation_. We've cheated together, we've sinned together…but we've also created something amazing that we're both too terrified to admit. It's so palpable you can taste it in the fucking air, Carlisle, and that…that's not something that can be fabricated."

He was shaking violently against me as his hands found my hips, his fingers squeezing and releasing as the silence enveloped us both. Without a word, he slowly began rocking us from side to side, regardless of the thrumming beat coming from inside the club. He held me close, lips against my jaw, breath sliding down the column of my neck as serenity washed over me and I merely allowed myself to feel him just like this.

His hands slid around my stomach and wrapped around my body until my back was tight to his front. He kissed my cheek, whispered my name….and said the words I would never be prepared for.

"You already know everything I've ever wanted to confess to you, lover." His lips moved against me slow. Gentle chase kisses against my cheek and jaw as he continued to rock me. "You embody everything that I will never ever deserve."

"Please don't," I quietly begged him.

He shushed me, his words becoming stuck in his throat as he continued. "Don't put me on a pedestal, Isabella. I will do nothing but hurt you. You're crying in a filthy alley in the middle of the night because my wife is on my arm. Believe me when I say I had no idea you'd be here. Damnit, Bella, you don't even know Carter. He refers to you as the brunette with the perfect ass. I want to kill him when he does. Why are you here?"

"Because I knew you'd be here," I answered automatically.

"Didn't you think I'd bring her?" he demanded.

"Maybe I'm a glutton for punishment. Maybe I'm addicted to the jealousy that fills my entire fucking being when I see her staking her claim on you. Maybe I want it," I challenged.

His breathing became labored as he grabbed a handful of my hair, pulling backwards until my head was resting on his shoulder, my throat arced and exposed for him to taste and suck.

But he didn't.

Instead, he simultaneously made me soar and broke my will with a mere handful of words.

"I belong to no one but you. I worship the fucking ground you walk on, and that's a truth I'm left to suffer with alone. You want to hear romantic words spill from my lips? You want to hear what it sounds like when I break down and tell you that I'm so fucking in love with you it _aches_?"

I moaned deep in the back of my throat as everything became hazy and overwhelmingly powerful.

"I am. I fucking _am_," he insisted.

Silence rang out between us until the air was so emotionally charged I was gasping for breath. With one sentence, he stole it all away.

"Every time…in the hospital…every time we were together, I let Angela blow me soon after. I needed something meaningless to cover up what meant everything," he murmured. "And you are _everything_."

Suddenly, I was falling

He dragged his body from mine without another word, leaving me painfully alone in the deserted alley. I fell to the dirty street below, trying to comprehend his confession made blurry by alcohol and need and despair.

And the despair…

It was staggering.

**-x-x-**

**x**

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**x**

**Um, review?**

**:)**


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